The semester is over, and yet again I am astonished. However, this semester hasn’t been like previous semesters. Instead of being shocked that things flew by so quickly, I’m simply relieved that I made it out in one piece. Spring Semester Review 2019, let’s get into it.
Friends, I’m not going to lie to you: Spring semester 2019 was rough. I decided the best way to deal with it was going to be not to talk about it publicly until it was over. I didn’t want the reminder of how bad things were or people asking me if things were better or what I was going to do. It was something I needed to deal with on my own.
Don’t get me wrong – there were some really good moments this semester!
These awesome times include:
- my first day of classes being cancelled due to a huge snowstorm that came through the night before
- the Jonas Brothers making a comeback!
- taking advantage of every opportunity to get more plants and succulents
- discovering that the dining hall makes some incredible (and I mean incredible!) asparagus
- learning all about the Myers-Briggs personality test from a professor who studied under none other than Myers herself
- scheduling my RA duties so that I was done by the end of February – yes, brutal, but I didn’t have to worry about being on duty for the majority of the semester!
- my acceptance into Omicron Delta Kappa, the National Leadership Honor Society
- acrylic pouring a record with art club (on the one day my class was cancelled and I could make the meeting!)
But the semester had a rough start.
I wasn’t able to go on a trip I had signed up and paid for and been assured everything was worked out for accessibility wise because – yep! You guessed it! Inaccessibility!
After that, there was just some bad fatigue and migraines. While probably not the worst migraines I’ve had, they were combined with fatigue like nothing I’ve ever experienced and yikes, I struggled through those first few weeks of classes. I eventually managed to lose my voice and land in the ER, but soon I was able to stay awake for long enough to attend class.
I made it back to classes, worked my butt off to catch up, and actually managed to get it all together. Don’t ask me how I did it because I couldn’t tell you. I’m just academically driven, I guess.
And yes, I did say I managed to fit all of my duty shifts into this same timeframe – the one weekend I had off happened to be the one I landed in the ER. Life just worked out for me like that.
It wasn’t always easy but I always completed my rounds, even if I had to nap in between them (let’s be real that was every single round). Thankfully, I had no emergencies for any of my nights. Some were bitterly cold (like when we had that polar vortex and it went below 0), but that’s a price I’m willing to pay. Big shout out to the residents who lent me multiple pairs of sweatpants to layer when I was going out in that weather – before my boss decided to share with us that we weren’t required to go out when it was that cold.
I caught up, finished my rounds for the semester, and I did well academically, but things just weren’t good.
There were so many problems with work. So many. These problems lasted all semester and honestly made me miserable at many points. Suddenly there were access problems and I was being told things that didn’t make sense and some of those above me couldn’t understand that I cannot work with last-minute or shifting:
- deadlines
- mandatory meetings
- events
Life just doesn’t work that way for me – I need to know what is expected of me in advance. And trust me, I had made this clear. From the start. It wasn’t a problem fall semester… but suddenly spring semester it was.
I had problems with peers, with group work, with dining, it was just a full mess. As I said, I really don’t know how I did it, because there were so many times I just wanted to leave.
Now you’re probably waiting to hear how the semester turned around… but I’m sorry to report that it never really did.
When some things would get better, others would get hard or fall apart.
I’m not writing this for your sympathy, I’m writing this because I reflect upon every semester. I know I’m not the only one who has semesters like this and I want others to know they aren’t alone when they’re sitting in their rooms lonely and frustrated and disappointed in their university.
My migraines eventually timed themselves so that even though they were a near daily occurrence, I could get through classes, come back to my room and nap. I was able to talk to my two amazing best friends when they were free, and hear about their college adventures. Every Friday, my one friend would FaceTime me and we would clean our rooms and chat about our weeks. We had sorta done this in the past, but this semester was consistent.
I really threw myself into my schoolwork and even though I tried to join clubs, it didn’t really work out. My classes overlapped with meetings or the meetings I could make were consistently canceled. People who say millennials have commitment issues may be on to something because I’d say that definitely applies to extracurriculars.
When you go to sleep early, take more time than most people to get through your work, and nap consistently due to migraines, it’s kinda hard to also seek out friendships. Especially when everyone has already been in their friend groups for a while. And by kinda hard, I mean really hard.
The most mind-blowing thing to me about this entire ordeal is that through talking to a few friends who attend other universities about the issues I was having, I wasn’t alone.
People were dropped by friends. Couldn’t find friends. Couldn’t find clubs that met consistently in order to make friends. They were so swamped with schoolwork they couldn’t imagine spending time doing anything else and they also had professors who just expected the most ridiculous things.
Oh yeah, one of my professors gave an impossible exam. Literally. He didn’t do his math correctly when making the midterm and three of the questions couldn’t be solved. Which he didn’t realize until everyone got them wrong when he was grading them. Did he give us credit anyway? Nope!
If I sound bitter about it, it’s because I hate thinking about last semester. Having now been home for two months, I think I have more clarity. It feels better, even though it’s still awful to think about sometimes. So I don’t. One day I’ll be over it, but I feel like I still need to share, even if it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Because this is a reality for a lot of people, and I want you to know that if this happens to you too, you’re not alone. I believe in you.
Finals were rough too, in case you were wondering.
Looking back, I’m just glad that it’s over. I hope that I will never experience a semester like that again.
I don’t think that’s exactly what people mean when they say there’s a “sophomore slump” but hey, I’m 50% of the way through my degree and can’t wait to be done. And I made Dean’s List. I know, who’d have thought?
Yes, I loved being an RA. I loved my residents. They were so sweet and watching them grow this semester was incredible. But unfortunately, the cons of the semester truly outweighed the pros when they were happening. The good was there, but it felt like it was less than the bad. I cherished those small interactions in the hall, the conversations with coworkers, and the relationships that I was able to build through my role as an RA.
There was just so much that wasn’t working for me. Don’t worry, a lot of those things will be changing next semester.
It was a confusing time and it’s still confusing to look back on. But that’s okay, it’s time to start looking forward. And with that, my spring semester review is complete.
High hopes for next semester, friends.
It’s going to be a good one.
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