College is a huge transition, and it can be hard to prepare yourself for everything that will come your way. Trust me, I was so ready to start college. And not only did I think I was prepared, I actually ended up being prepared. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t have any curve balls thrown my way! Quite the contrary.
Looking back there are a lot of things that I saw happening to myself and those around me that I hadn’t heard anyone talk about before. And this is coming from the girl who had been all over all the college blogs trying to get all the info she could – starting the spring of her junior year! I’ve found that knowing I’m not alone in what may be a seemingly isolating experience can make all the difference in making my way through it.
All of this to say I wanted to give you, a prospective college student, first year college student, high schooler, whoever you are, a glimpse at some things that may happen when you go to college that you might not expect, or be prepared for.
9 Things that May Happen When You Go to College (That You Totally Didn’t Expect):
- Miss weird Home traditions
- Become closer with high school friends
- Get acne
- Not get along with your roommates
- Not make friends right away
- Fall out with the friends you make right away
- Stop talking to people you said you’d “always” be friends with
- Have a “What do I actually want to do with my life?!” crisis
- Get sore from all the walking you’re doing (invest in some walking shoes)
It’s a lot. How was it for me? How do you deal with the bad stuff?
Missing home traditions you didn’t realize you had:
I can’t say I ever got homesick in my first year of college, but I can say that I found myself missing things I didn’t expect. Little traditions I hadn’t thought of as such until I wasn’t there to take part in them. Things like watching ESPN College Game Day on Saturday mornings in the fall with my dad, and going to get pumpkins with my family from the cutest pumpkin farm we visit every year. I didn’t realize how much I really loved doing those things until I suddenly didn’t have the opportunity anymore. Of course I could still go to get pumpkins, and I still watched College Game Day, but it wasn’t the same.
To deal with this, I made my own little routines, schedules, and things to look forward to. And eventually, I did some of them with friends, which made it even more fun. I’m dedicated to my Mask Monday’s every Monday evening when I’m on campus, and getting up early for a nice walk on Saturday mornings was something I grew to look forward to for the peace and quiet. If you’ve been around for a while or read this post, this post, or this post ( let’s be honest there are probably even more, I wrote about this topic a lot), you’ll know I’m also pretty passionate about my Tater Tot Tuesday’s. Anticipating Tuesday night dinners with friends is something I can’t wait to get back to when class is back in session.
Becoming closer with high school friends.
One really odd thing that happened to me over the first semester was that I became closer with some friends I had gone to high school with, who were going to other colleges. While this was awesome, I totally didn’t see it coming. Some of my new friends said they were talking to high school friends more as well, so this definitely isn’t just me. Maybe there’s something about going somewhere new and changing everything that makes you want to invest in what is familiar.
It is always great to connect with people, but remember to still be present and not to get too caught up in these relationships to the point that you miss opportunities with your peers, or the people down the hall. Those are the people who can get you notes from class and go to the dining hall with, who you may be wishing you spent more time with when you’re reminiscing in four years.
Getting acne. Bad. Acne.
Real talk: when I moved into college the second week I was there I got awful acne. I’m not talking about just a minor breakout or a few pimples. I’m talking about dark, painful spots of cystic acne that showed up all over my cheeks and jaw line. Thankfully, since around the start of the spring semester I have been able to start getting it under control, but it wasn’t easy. I can also say that I am by no means the only one to experience this! My suitemates both had a similar experience, and I’ve spoken to friends at other colleges who suddenly had the same problem. Some of them had never even had acne before!
Whether it’s the stress of a new environment, a new diet, or just changing hormones, getting acne was definitely not on the list of things I expected to happen when I went to college. I wish I had brought my acne cleansers and creams with me to college. It just wasn’t on my radar! Now, even with my skin in a much better state, I won’t be leaving my acne products at home, in the event it decides to flare up again. If this happens to you in college and you’re caught without anything to heal it, don’t be afraid to do some research, start-up a new skin care regimen, or make an appointment with a dermatologist. Your skin and happiness is worth the time and investment.
Getting along with your roommates (or suitemates):
Speaking of suitemates, you may not get along with yours. You may not get along with your roommate. But guess what? You really don’t need to be best friends with the people you live with to have a functional living situation. Bottom line when the going gets tough? Respect each other, take care of your responsibilities, and set rules in the beginning of the year – even if you don’t think you need them because you’ll all get along *so well*, communication can easily break down and tempers can flare.
If you have a roommate contract and include even small housekeeping things, like taking your hair out of the drain after you shower, it can help keep everyone civil when things get stressful or it turns out you and the people you’re living with aren’t a match made in heaven. Because the last thing you need when you live with people you don’t love is a full-out screaming match, started by someone not doing something you expected them to. News flash: for better or worse, not everyone grew up with your parent’s standards.
Not making friends right away:
If you don’t make friends right away that’s okay. There’s this universal narrative you probably grew up with, and you’re telling yourself that you’ll go to college, bump into someone and instantly bond and do everything together, and realize you’re pretty much the exact same person. Then you’ll pick up some others who happen to be just like the two of you, with a couple of quirks for variety.
I’m sure this actually happens to some people, but it does not happen for everyone. It can be hard to find friends in college, which I know is the last thing anyone wants to hear, but its true. Don’t give up if after the first week you haven’t found your “squad”, good friendships are worth waiting for. Keep looking around, going to events, and invite people to do things. It’ll happen.
About those friends you made right away:
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the friends you made at orientation and the first month of college may not be your friends come second semester. They may not even be your friends come midterms! That is totally and completely 100% okay. Those friendships you rushed into may not turn out to be with people you actually want to be around or associate with at the end of the day. I mean, I know I’m not a perfect judge of character and made some mistakes in who I worked with and spent time with.
A falling out with a fast friend isn’t the end of the world, and it’s okay to be friends for only a short season. You don’t have to force something that isn’t meant to be. It is so easy to feel bad or guilty for spending time with people you wish you hadn’t, and to regret it. But remember, this is college and everything is a learning experience! You learned and you grew, and other people will come around. There are more people who are actually awesome just waiting for you to walk into their lives!
So you aren’t talking to that friend you swore you’d always be close with:
That best friend you said you would always be best friend’s with may go to college and decide to do a complete 180 and reinvent themselves. You can go along for the ride, but if that change doesn’t resonate with you and you find yourself in a place where that person no longer feels like an essential to your life, you can let them go. I’m serious. If it doesn’t feel right, let them go.
Maybe you just need a break as you both transition into a new phase of life, and you’ll end up back together connected at the hip like old times. It’s okay if that doesn’t happen though. The end of friendships can hurt, but its a natural part of life. Again, there are always more people out there! And the end of a huge friendship doesn’t mean that everything that happened in it wasn’t valuable or needed.
When you have a mid-semester life crisis about anything and everything:
I found myself starting to explore the depths of my university’s website sometimes when I was bored or needed a quick break from work. This lead me (most of the time) to academic planning sheets, where I would explore and explore majors, minors, classes, everything! It was a very bad idea sometimes. It would lead me down the rabbit hole of thinking “Wait a second, what if THIS is actually what I want to do with my life?!?!?” And that can lead to hours of rethinking and re-evaluating that may be productive, but may also just be a stressful waste of time. I honestly think whenever my friends texted me, asking what I was doing, and I responded that I was knee-deep in academic planning sheets again, I could hear them groan.
It was a huge problem for me, but at the end of the day it was sort of helpful to go through everything and figure out what I thought would be best for me. If you find yourself in this position, here is the best advice I could give you, and what I wish I could go back and tell myself:
- If you have no interest in something and other things to do, don’t waste your time looking into it
- Set time limits for your internet deep dives if you actually have assignments you need to complete because this isn’t worth losing sleep over, even if it feels like it is in the moment
- Talk to people about their experiences and be realistic with yourself – this really helped me figure out the path I wanted to take, once I figured out I needed to get off my computer, out of my head, and into the real world
- You will figure it out
You’re a couple of weeks into your college career and you’re so sore:
I went from hiding in my house from the heat all summer (heat intolerance is no joke), to walking around campus all day to and from classes, my friends rooms, and the dining hall, feeling incredibly happy that the weather was unseasonably cool! My body’s reaction? Sore muscles. Really, really sore muscles. And again, I am so not the only one!
I wrote more about why you should invest in walking shoes for college in this post, but the bottom line is that the old saying is true: a pair of shoes can really change your life. You can go from your legs being so sore you can barely move them (thankfully I wasn’t ever that bad), to bouncing around campus with ease. When things got rough for me, I ditched my beloved Converse with insoles, and went for my hiking shoes. Function may win over fashion this time, but no one really questions what shoes you wear with leggings. And I could feel my body was grateful for the change! You may adjust to all of the movement and carrying a backpack around eventually, but coming in prepared with good walking shoes is usually a good idea.
There you have it: 9 unexpected things that might happen when you go to college.
No one told me these things may happen when I went to college. And I totally didn’t expect them! I mean, doesn’t everyone say when high school is over your acne will go away anyway because you won’t be stressed? No one says, “Hey, it may come back when you go to college!” or “Hey, so, you may not get along with the people you live with so think about how to prevent any issues in the first place!” Those would have been really nice warnings!
So here’s me, telling you that those nine things may happen when you go to college. But now, you know! And you won’t be unprepared for it, like me and so many others have been before.
If you learned something new, share this with someone you think it could help! Don’t be afraid to pin this post to have it on hand whenever you need it. You can always find more posts like this on my Pinterest page too.
Good luck in college! You got this.
